WHO AM I? SOMEONE WHO WAS BORN TO THRIVE

We owe it to ourselves, our families, friends and posterity to break the negative patterns by choosing to evolve into the person we want to be. It is time for you to take that mammoth leap by standing up to the past and wrestling it to the ground through therapy, prayer and self-help because you’re powerful and strong!

Throughout history, people have grappled with their humanity. They are constantly seeking to improve their lives. As a result, they seek ways to harness their true potential that will elevate them to that realm of social and economic stability. They strive to gain a good education, great jobs, promotions, houses, and cars. However, at the center of this, they want to create strong family bonds with their spouses, children, extended family, and friends while creating balance and stability in their lives. Many have tried hard and although some have accomplished tremendous feats, they still cannot have meaningful relationships with anyone.  The answer to this lies within themselves and they must dig deep to find it. To do so we all must ask ourselves this question: who am I? Have you ever stopped to ponder this?

Three years ago, I made a list of questions that I needed answers to and, at the top of my list, was this very question.  I had written this in my diary but had forgotten about it.  A couple of days ago, while wrestling with emotions, I felt impressed to revisit this question. While I pondered this, the following thoughts came to my mind and I would like to share them with you.  We all have a past that is linked to the future we are trying to create. We can only experience real joy and happiness in our lives when we dig up the past, thoroughly investigate every finding and, are willing to attempt to fix anything that is broken.

Many children were abandoned by their parents while some were given up for adoption and they secretly loathe the parents whom they perceive never loved them. Others felt abandoned because their parents were emotionally unavailable or might have criticized them repeatedly. Deep down, there is a longing for that maternal or paternal attachment that was missing from their childhood. As a result, they wander throughout life aimlessly feeling like they do not belong. Hence, they strive to create this sense of belonging by joining groups, creating friendships or even starting a family while relying on them to give them that sense of worthiness. Others have become super achievers just to win men’s empty praises, which temporarily stokes one’s ego and creates a false sense of worth.

Sometimes we will desperately latch onto those who are empaths because of the positive energy they exude which awakens us. This can create an unnecessary strain on them because while they are fulfilling your needs theirs are unmet. Although you thrive on their energy sadly, their needs are ignored because you do not know how to reciprocate. Oftentimes this results in frustrations for the family member whether a spouse, sibling or even friends. You see there is not a single person who can fill the void in your soul. It is your responsibility to take the time to explore who you are, figure out what has caused that void in your life, how it is detracting you from your completeness as a person and get the help you need to steer you towards wholeness.

Some of us experienced severe trauma in our childhood from sexual abuse, physical abuse and psychological abuse. In most cases, this has led to addictions such as alcoholism, promiscuity, drug addiction, food addiction, low self-esteem and suicidal tendencies. Oftentimes, these wounds were inflicted by a teacher, religious leaders, family members or family friends and these have left scars that are buried so deep that even we ourselves cannot find them. Only with the help of a qualified counselor can these traumatic events be uncovered and dealt with over some time. Failure to do this will result in a missing YOU. Why do you continue to live with the altered version of yourself when you have the power to reclaim your individuality?

Despite how we view ourselves, we were created by God who loves and gave us mental faculties that are superior to that of animals. (John 3:16; Genesis 1:26-27) He also gave us gifts so that we can believe, think, dream, create, and live an abundant life that is free from fear and worry.

First published in 2021